You will have challenges in your life that you have to overcome, and it doesn’t matter if they are bigger or smaller than the challenges other people have to face. If it’s a challenge, it’s a challenge, and therefore requires some attention. Add to that the fact that there is absolutely no point in comparing yourself to others on any level whatsoever. You only need to compare yourself now to how you were in the past, or how you will be in the future. Other people in your life will come and go, but the one person in your life who endures for the whole of your life is you.
This is not to suggest that you should disrespect, ignore, abuse or exploit other people. Each of these people are in charge of themselves, just as the only person you are in charge of (outside of employment / business places or other organisations) is yourself. This is useful to remember when other people try to hand you something which they are responsible for, because then you can hand it straight back to them.
Similarly, when they try to tell you how to do something, it is useful to remember that they are offering you a solution that works well for them, not you — no matter how well-meaning their intention is. It may be useful to remind them that you already have (or are currently working on) a solution for that thing that works well for you, and you may wish to add that you are glad that they already have a solution that works well for them.
So, when you begin to consider what it means to ‘get things right’, you already know that the loaded word here is ‘right’, and rather than accepting what other people (even the majority) consider to be ‘right’, you have to define that word for yourself in a way that you know will work well for you in every situation. Only then, can you design your own solution.
For example, if you believe that everyone (including you) should be able to do whatever they want, provided that they don’t do any harm to others or themselves, that definition may be problematic for people of faith, or for those who wish to live strictly by the letter of the law, or for those who believe that war can be a solution that works. You would also have to define the word ‘harm’ for yourself, as there can be differing interpretations or definitions of what that word means, according to life experiences, cultural background or differing legal systems or governmental infrastructure.
Thus, creating solutions for yourself rather than adopting those of other people can be challenging enough, but ensuring that they work well for you may be another matter. That may be dependent on multiple external forces.
It is also true that nothing lasts forever. The solutions that worked well for you in your teens are unlikely to work well for you in your 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, 50’s or 60’s. And by the time you are in your 60’s (and older) you will probably need to review your solutions year-upon-year, if not month-by-month.
Of course, I am one person offering one opinion of what I think about what ‘getting it right’ and ‘making it work well for you’ means. What you may need to do is decide for yourself what your opinion is, and then adopt that as a solution, and make it work well for you……or perhaps do something else entirely.
Perhaps even write about it on Medium.
Fraser
September 2023